Dr Oz faces ridicule for telling Americans to cut drug use to save money, prompting a swift online reaction. With diabetics and other patients needing medication, this suggestion feels as outlandish as it gets.
Kids across three U.S. states are being told to avoid the outdoorsâno recess, no backyard adventures, just indoor boredom. Childhood memories now come with screen glare and filtered air in this climate change plot twist.
The UKâs finest have swapped truncheons for trowels, running cannabis farms that would make any stoner jealous. Britainâs police cultivating cannabis isnât an April Foolsâ prankâjust another day in the British justice system.
One NYU student got an unexpected wake-up callâcourtesy of their roommateâs bladder. The administrationâs response? Less action, more head-scratching, as dorm life at Americaâs quirkiest university gets even weird.
In an unprecedented bureaucratic plot twist, Social Security vanished thousands of retirees after a DOGE-named agency wielded too much delete power. Turns out, being 'digitally dead' doesnât help you collect benefitsâor set up a game night.
Texas politicians want to evict furries from school grounds, leaving mascots nervously checking their fur suits. The furry subculture crackdown raises eyebrows and hackles in the Lone Star Stateâs education system.
Blink-182âs bassist swears his pop-punk wisdom guided US forces to Saddam. Somewhere, a Pentagon playlist just got a lot weirderâand history teachers everywhere are nervously shredding their lesson plans.
Science meets Olympic-level awkwardness as the worldâs first official sperm race crowns a champion. Genetics, fertility clinics, and way too much competitive energy collide in humanityâs weirdest new sport, now streaming for curious onlookers worldwide.
One moment you're channeling your inner gymnast, the next you're seeing nothing but darkness. A British womanâs cartwheel marathon turns into an unexpected, vision-blurring Olympic event.
Peter Hudson was discovered mid-romance with his sex doll on the front porch, confessing to both neighbors and the courtâall in one moment. British justice meets inflatable companionship in a scene so surreal, even Love Islandâs casting directors would think twice.
Humanoid robots lined up for the worldâs first robot half-marathon, promptly proving theyâre better at slapstick than sprinting. Beijingâs robo-runners wowed crowds with accidental acrobatics and slow-motion drama, not exactly threatening human athletic supremacy this year.
Social Security declares living immigrants dead to encourage departureâbureaucratic mix-ups take a dark turn into the afterlife.
A viral TikTok trend for 'Dubai chocolate' has sparked a worldwide pistachio shortage, leaving nut lovers and chocolatiers scrambling for supplies.
Yahoo, infamous for its early-2000s nostalgia and bold pivots, is gearing up to acquire Chrome if Google must part ways. Get ready for Internet Explorer dĂŠjĂ vuâYahooâs legacy meets Googleâs browser in a battle for digital relevance.
